joy

I’ve been trying to take in as much positivity I can, it feels a little wrong. Like I should be more victimized. But the universe is taking care of me. Or am I taking care of me? There is one thing, I feel like I went for, like I pursued and I feel I have a real chance to get something I really want. The way it’s happening, the timing of it all seems mythical. is this magic? It makes me incredibly nervous, and embarrassingly happy. I’ve traded C’s. Every now and then I’ll have a flashback and I’ll feel sad, & angry again but really, truly I am overwhelmingly hopeful again.

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